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How to Influence Others

Posted by Jody Urquhart on Tue, Sep 27, 2016 @ 12:14 PM

motivational speaker and influenceBy simply increasing your exposure to someone ( being around them), you build familiarity and increase your chances of influencing them.

According to the popular book, the Like Switch, this entails simple exposure to them, and does not include any interaction. By being in someone's proximity, you reduce any threat or anxiety, a person may naturally have for a stranger. Exposure creates a distinct familiarity and comfort zone. This is the first element of the influence formulae, designed to build strong relationships.

Next, increase frequency, duration and intensity. Frequency and duration, have an inverse relationship. If you see a friend often, the duration of your visits will likely be shorter.  Because of your familiarity, you already know about their lives, and have less catching up to do. Long lost friends, you haven't seen in awhile, require more catching up and visits of a longer duration.

According to the authors, the influence formulae involves increasing relationship:

Proximity...how close you are in proximity to each other

Frequency...how often you see someone

Duration ...how long you see someone

Intensity... How connected and personal you are. Being in the same room and not talking does not necessarily strengthen relationships, but talking and connecting does.

By regularly adjusting the formulae, you can alter your relationships. To get closer to someone, increase all of the elements. To distance yourself from someone, slowly decrease exposure, intensity, duration and frequency. Eventually, they will get the hint.

Find out how to Hire a Motivational Speaker to influence others

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